Sincerely Insincere,

It seems to me that the primary talent required for a TV presenter is raging insincerity; the ability to appear enthusiastic about things that are quite clearly tripe. I have just watched one of those house makeover programs where they remove the homeowners for a day or so and then redecorate their house by painting old bits of junk and hanging it on the wall. The presenter then waxes lyrical for the camera about the originality and talent of the interior designer who looks suitably smug. The homeowner is introduced to the wonderful transformation and starts crying. Are those tears of joy or frustration at their new lime green kitchen, what's wrong with magnolia?

When I was younger and used to listen to radio the DJs all used to rave about the latest releases. Every record was a sure fire hit and destined for the top spot. I didn't once hear a DJ say ' this is rubbish but some monkey put it on the playlist so I have to play it.' As I became older and more cynical it occurred to me that the presenters can't possibly like every record they play, unless you were John Peel.

Dearly beloved and I sometimes watch The Chase presented by Bradley Walsh. It's a good quiz show and Mr Walsh comes over as a nice chap but the show is scripted practically from beginning to end. Poor old Bradley says exactly the same thing at each part of the show every day and it's starting to irritate me a little. It must be driving our Bradders bonkers. I don't watch it that often although I can still pretty much quote it word for word but Mr Walsh smiles on gamely and spouts his spiel as if it's the first time he has ever heard it. Now that's true talent. He does depart from the script to have a little banter with his guests but then its straight back to the script' I'm sorry but for you the chase is over.'

Well known faces enthusiastically endorsing products is a whole other ball game. No one is going to object to Mr Beckham advertising sporting brands, after all a shirt is a shirt. However, the likes of Michael Parkinson and Carol Vorderman seeming to give the thumbs up to financial products that most people don't understand is another matter entirely. 'I should get one because Michael says so' is no way to plan your financial future. I believe the lovely Ms Vorderman did get some stick for her financial related adverts and has since taken to advertising clothing instead. She just has to look glam and wave herself at the camera so she is on much safer ground here but it's probably a knock for women's lib. Unfortunately for Mr Parkinson, no one is going to pay him to advertise fashion, unless it's incontinence pants.

So there you have it. For all you wanna be presenters out there, you don't have to be smart or attractive and you don't have to be funny or have a big personality. You just need to be able to pretend that the old tyre which has been painted silver and hung on the wall is possibly the greatest art work of the 21st century. To quote that cultural Icon Benny Hill, ' that's what showbiz is, sincere insincerity.